United States Politics: ∆τ_i*ε*φ*m_i<0 where ε=4 and φ=0.25

[Tucker's Law]

Trump is missing for a day, wonder where he is…

Libs: He’s dying

Right wingers: he’s doing some secret deal to save the world

Reality: 

I get a chuckle just thinking of all that speculation only for it to turn out Trump was holed up with security all weekend, likely sitting there reviewing video in an apoplectic fury the whole time, the kind of rage that specifically comes from dealing with contractors.