Random Talk

[Potato]

Oh, this should be fun. I know all about Latinas.

What country does she come from originally?

[Nintex]

She mentioned Pisco Sour so either Peru or Chile.

Shared my number with 30F too. She is happy we matched.

[Nintex]

She's from Chile

And I studied in a German school so we needed to sing the Chilean and German every Monday

Puerto Varas

German grand parent on both sides.

[Potato]

Just shit on Argentina and Peru and you'll be fine.

[Nintex]

Well she's pretty damn great. The energy, flirting, romance, sophisticated nerdiness. In the chat it's all there. We're going to dinner wednesday in my town, home turf I picked a place with great sofas so we can immediately get close if it clicks. If it does we'll watch a movie at my place. She liked the menu and already knows what she'll order. 

A weird combination of Latina passion with her German heritage that makes her love beer, mountains and apparently tall white guys. She's also a genuine movie fan. Unlike the other women that said they watched movies but actually didn't really. "Don't hate me Nintex but... Interstellar"  

She says she has been smiling at our chat the entire night. And I'm not gonna lie, it's a great one, probably the best yet. Also kept the kid out as she said she would, the ex and problems too. I told her to leave those difficult topics behind after she shared them so she could really focus on the date and we could retreat into our bubble at my place. The fact that she shared them meant that they would no longer bother us. Since she got stuck friendzone dating she likes that guidance and the focus on romance.

That's the big difference with the previous ones that didn't seem ready to turn the page. 

But I also told her that the well being of her kid would always come first no matter what happens between us and well, that was a winner.

So on wednesday I'm dating a curvy latina with what seems like an E-cup that is barely held together by her blouse to try and help her get her mojo back*.
(well that was the intention until she wondered what her mother is paying me to give all the right answers on everything she asks "where have you been all my life and what's the catch" )

[Nintex]

So far so good still.

We settled on minimal communication during the day so we don't stumble into the friendzone or bf/gf experience again. It was just "have a lovely day chico" and "good morning bella" and the reservation details instead of live blogging. 

I've also consulted with Grok what topics to avoid in general so we can keep the focus on staying out of the friendzone and retreat into our bubble after dinner.

Overall she really appreciates that I'm keeping her on track to be my FWB. She thanked her executive papi. 

[BIONIC]

[Nintex]

Well we're still in the clear. She's looking forward to tommorow with exclamation marks. She's at a friend so I guess I passed that test too. 

And I'm excited as well because she provided me with a challenge right from the get go. So now my mind isn't trying to solve the issue of matching our lifestyles, fixing past traumas or overcoming cultural barriers or anything like that but instead its laser focused on how we can stay out of the friendzone. Because that's the quest this quest giver has provided me with. So I'm picking the most cozy restaurant with great sofas. I'm thinking about setting the right mood with the RGB lights, finding a playlist with romantic jazz music she likes and what to text to build up her desire rather than make her happy or like me.

[Potato]

Just try to be normal on the date dude. 

Some topics that are completely off limits: 

• Trump
  
• religion
  
• sexual history
  
• finances.
  

If she raises this stuff, nod politely and look for a way to steer the conversation into other territories.

Some topics that are off limits unless she brings them up first: 

• wanting to start a family
  
• politics
  
• video games
  
• health issues
  
• family dramas.
  

The second category you should focus on asking her questions rather than going on a monologue about your thoughts on any of it. If she asks your opinion, give short thoughtful answers and then ask her a question on that topic in return.

[Polident]

[who is ted danson?]

just be yourself
show her trump memes

[Potato]

If all else fails, just ask her the eternal question: 

"What is best in life?"

If she answers, "The open steppe, fleet horse, falcons at your wrist, and the wind in your hair," she's the wrong one for you.

[Uncle]

kind of had a george constanza/larry david moment earlier

the "watch someone doing something, overthink it, speak up and screw yourself over into a farce"

at mcdonalds watching the disinterested teenager waiting for the machine to finish my shitty latte

she's got the lid in her hand already

bin full of stirring spoons right next to her, they're supposed to stir it, I've seen them do it plenty of times

"she's not gonna stir it," I think, "it's gonna taste like shit until I get to a point where I can stir it myself"

she didn't stir it

however, I am not larry david; I didn't say a word and stirred it myself later



if this was a seinfeld episode, you can hear the dialogue easily

"she didn't stir it!" "no stir?" "no SIR!" "well I think that's unbecoming of a company like McDonald's, known for their excellence and quality" *audience laughs at Jerry's sarcasm*

"y'know next time I'm gonna say something?" "oh-kay, here we go..." "no, I'm serious! I mean, how much effort does it take, the spoon is right there!"

and then next time he politely asks for a stir and the bored teenager says "you want me to remake it?" "Nono, noo, I just want you to...stir it. A little." "Sir I'm not allowed to take back food I've already placed in a customer's hand. Please pull forward into a mobile order spot and we'll bring it out to you."

and George wails in frustration, and they take 10 minutes to do it, making him late for some big scheme Kramer was cooking up in the story's A plot

[Nintex]

Well the date was... great. The best one yet, on every level.

Instant click, great dinner and some romance at my place. We spend 5 hours together, weren't bored a single moment. We both like to take our time. Last to leave the restaurant.

When I told her: "You did it, you got us out of the friendzone" she made such sweet noises I nearly melted. Because even when my hand was up her skirt squeezing and rubbing those thick thighs in fishnets, she still wasn't sure I was into her. I told her: "fuck what people think, you deserve this". And she loves that rebel spirit because yes in general you should avoid talking politics but not when you're dating the granddaughter of the founder of the socialist party of Chile and the daughter of a regional health minister. Who has such a rich family history that it's basically an Indiana Jones movie and she wants her chico to help connect the dots, because he's really good at it.

As soon as she got home she texted that it was a beautiful first date, she has a friend from Chile coming over next week but she's sure we can figure something out to date again soon.
She might change her mind, could happen but I highly doubt it based on the 5 - 10 minutes of goodbye of hugs and kisses as she took off.

But yeah she is curvy, like she told me her Tinder pictures weren't accurate at all.
Curvy as in thick thighs, e-cup, dumptruck booty such a cute pretty face with fair skin that she could pass for 25 easily.

We both wanted to create a bubble of love and romance away from the daily struggles and negativity and we did it.
And now all she has to do is hop on her bike to return to it.

[DavidCroquet]

I was in a relationship for many years with a real-life "Building Number 7" girl. 

And I would tell people oh no, she's great! I mean, she's really into Loose Change and all that, but like...that's the only thing. 

But she was not great and it was not the only thing. Don't date girls who talk about building number 7.

This 10+ year too-late dating advice is offered free of charge.

[Nintex]

Aaand.... she didn't break up with her chico this morning.

Time to plan date dos.

[Nintex]

2nd date set for May 4th, we're going to watch Interstellar. "That's so sweet Nintex, I'd love to " 
When the time comes I hope the weather is great and I'll tell her to wear something comfy.

The idea came to me as I drove near the airport today. She really likes how I can sell things. After I planted the first kiss she looked at me like "did you really just do that?" and licked her lips looking at me with questioning puppy eyes if it was all "ok" involving a dating app and all and well I convinced her that creating our escape bubble of love totally was.

She's kind of sorry that she can't plan it earlier but starting tommorow she has a friend over from Chile for a week and the kid of course. I told her I would get us a cozy blanket to ease her worries about not being available sooner and make her more excited that this date will be at least as good as the first. "  "

[Uncle]

sounds like you're both playing a game and it's not really on a path to knowing each others' faults in a way that leads to building a life together

of course that's way far off from where you're at now, but just the way you're saying "screw the haters, we will love each other," it sounds like it's just talk, saying the things you're expected to say and not being honest

[benji]

She's from Chile

And I studied in a German school so we needed to sing the Chilean and German every Monday

Puerto Varas

German grand parent on both sides.

I told her: "fuck what people think, you deserve this". And she loves that rebel spirit because yes in general you should avoid talking politics but not when you're dating the granddaughter of the founder of the socialist party of Chile and the daughter of a regional health minister. Who has such a rich family history that it's basically an Indiana Jones movie and she wants her chico to help connect the dots, because he's really good at it.

Whatever you do, don't believe her about the rebel spirit and tell her that if she breaks up with you, she's going for a helicopter ride if she doesn't use the AK-47 first.

But do consider outfitting your living room like this:

[Polident]

I ate like trash today. A lot of ice cream and a massive fried pork cutlet topped with four whole eggs. Such a huge rush of energy for an hour or so. Now it’s barely 7PM and I’m crashing hard. Need to head to the gym and I’m utterly defeated in a post-Thanksgiving type of haze.

Been watching this on loop until I can drag myself up

[Nintex]

sounds like you're both playing a game and it's not really on a path to knowing each others' faults in a way that leads to building a life together

of course that's way far off from where you're at now, but just the way you're saying "screw the haters, we will love each other," it sounds like it's just talk, saying the things you're expected to say and not being honest

She parked a relationship outside the door for now until at least she has moved to a different town in a few months (where my office is). After date 1 lasted 5 hours and annoyed the other couples in the restaurant because ours was so fun and romantic, we couldn't ignore it, we talked about all those things in the end.

How do I know it's real? After I told my story she was shocked and emotional it was the last thing she asked before she left. So much death, disease and pain. She didn't believe I was still standing let alone smiling. And she had seen her fair share of pain, such as her dead boyfriend. But then it wasn't: "Oh wow, you did such a great job". No she looked at me with quivering lips and gave me the longest, tightest and warmest hug anyone has ever given to me in my life. And when she was done she said: "From now on your beautiful smile will be even brighter thank you for everything you did for me". 

And then I followed her out the door to her bike and we kissed and hugged every 3 steps or so like some basic programming kicked in. Reaching up to hug me was her favorite thing. 

When she got home she texted that she got home safely and it was the most beautiful first date.
So without hesitation I told her we should plan a second and she responded with this: :O

Still surprised I was interested after all that. 

This angel isn't perfect no but she's very special with a heart of gold.

The only question for me is if date 2 will be as good as date 1 but I'm basically already setting it up for success again.
I'm getting a cozy blanket, pillows, more lights, champagne and Interstellar is her favorite movie. I'm also free the next day.

[Nintex]

Haha she wants to meet sooner. Actually deleted one message that she thought might've been too much.

She'll let me know when but I clearly need to speed up my prep work. It's likely a day closer to today than it is to the 4th.

The biggest risk I feel is that she worries she might jump into a relationship too soon or that I'll lose interest.
My reply to her about apologizing for her phone habits will probably receive a couple hundred hearts though. 

Anyway for kings day I'm heading to the fair and trying my hand at some claw machines. I'm an expert. Sending a picture of my adventures grabbing her plushies will probably ease her worries and confirm I'm chill about the whole thing while at the same time showing my interest. 

Also claw machines, raw sigma energy beating impossible odds. You know it's a fraud but you beat them anyway  

[killamajig]

Did Nintex find his Tischy?

[Nintex]

Won 2 plushies 

"This machine is a scam" 
No bro, it's a skill issue.

[Nintex]

Did Nintex find his Tischy?

No, she is such an enigma. I wanted a puzzle box and well I found one.
A Latina with a calm demeanor that enjoys Bach and Wagner and wanted to try my gaming chair. Where the hell do you find that.

And I need those dumptruck thighs on my couch again and in my bed. Soon. 

If not well I know my favorite body type now. One of those 'I always knew but didn't pay attention until it hit me' moments.

[Besticus Maximus]

If not well I know my favorite body type now.

Type 1 or 2?

[Nintex]

It's curvy

Weight depends on the distribution and build but curvy features matter more.

She figured it out as soon as she stepped in the door though and served me those thighs in fishnets as bait. 
I don't think she could've possibly put them in a more accessible position.

Thankfully I figured this one out on time so I can get her more excited for date 2. 

I was thinking too much in terms of Interstellar is her favorite movie while her favorite thing is having those legs worshipped.
She liked backrubs well enough but those legs heated up quick like a microwave.

[Nintex]

Yup that worked. Hearts for all my messages.

Telling her the habit of not using her phone when she's meeting someone made me think more highly of her was a winner, the claw machine skills and that I had a great kings day too. But her legs being softer than the new blanket I got for movie night.... biggest winner by far.

She was very busy, drained mentally and socially, opened our chat worried for more anger but found understanding, love and a bit of fun. And that is rewarded with a nice picture, I brightened up her day. She remembers our date as fondly as I do (perhaps even moreso). Now she knows if people give her shit or she's winding down from a long day she can hit me up and flirt.

I knew she was persistent and I'm very proud of her. It's very difficult to remain positive and focus on romance. Much easier to do what the others did, give up at the slightest setback.

Those curves will return to my couch 

[Nintex]

[Polident]

Sitting in a cafe and the lady who works here has a box of wrapped straws. For the past half an hour, she’s been ripping off paper covers and putting them into another box. I feel like I’m going mad.