Journal of Other Forum Analysis (Volume II, Issue 2)

[simiansmarts]

Member only:
https://www.resetera.com/threads/mental-health-era-ot2-community-and-understanding.95803/page-96#post-154769833

I'm some fucking shithead that is in the running for one of the worst humans to ever exist (like, on the level of Trump, Hitler, Stalin, Mao, Leopold 2, Putin, Netanyahu, the Kims etc.). I am so utterly, completely dogshit with basically nothing to offer. I'm stupid; a failure; usive, abusive; broke; uncharismatic; don't do anything meaningful better than anyone else; fat; disabled; broke; skilless; a pariah; a cretin; a coward; lazy; picky; useless; imperfect; and so much more. I ruin social relationships all the fucking time with my own actions. I have achieved essentially nothing with my life when you're expected to have it all figured by 18 and it feels like basically everyone else is instantly successful. I punish myself for my shittiness, but it's never enough. And I'd think that people would love me self-bashing myself, yet for some reason, 99% of people dislike it. Despite my shittiness; despite the world being filled with cruel and sadistic people; despite people loving it in middle school... am I just not finding the right people? Why do people not appreciate me bringing justice to myself when no one else will?

I also struggle at times if wondering if the far right is "correct". I have little confidence and self-esteem and they sound "smart" and confident. Plus they just hate me for being me. Nothing I can do will ever be good for them for my innate traits (being autistic and asexual in this case), so I guess it's kind of validating to know that there's people who avoid the same tired optimistic platitudes about me ("you have 'value'", "you're too hard on yourself", and other crap I've heard a million times). They'd be willing to torture me for my failures and maybe even kill me. Yet I never hang around them. I'm scared of them and they're quite frankly otherwise generally disgusting. Yet I'm just so damned bad and there's not enough justice being done against me that, yeah. Plus they already won in the US and run the country... little I can do against them at this point. The world they seek sounds awful and boring, with the added caveat that they would never accept me (like it would turn out well even if they did... fascists eat themselves... it's a part of their ideology).

I keep hoping that my self-hatred will bear better fruit. That someone will actually like it (some do agree with my points about myself, at least). Yeah, I've destroyed so many relationships over it; tormented myself endlessly (though it's on and off at times... I still need some neutrality to get things done); have had depression since I was very young; etc. But I have to bring justice to an otherwise innately horrible human being (and I hold hypocritical double standards against myself to hate myself more... I'm not usually so harsh on myself). And any time I've tried "optimism", it's blown up in my face and I had my normal beliefs about myself reaffirmed. But when will others like me for my self-torment?

he sounds like the woke version of hoemath   
 
 
 
I never understood these types who complain that they're life failures with no motivation but put all their effort into massive autistic screeds and manifestos about how they can't do anything.

[D3RANG3D]

Spoiler:  (click to show)(click to hide)

[killamajig]

Well, I'm disabled (high-functioning autism, or whatever you call it these days), heavily sex-repulsed, asexual, and don't want kids. And I'm unwilling to accommodate a partner who wants sex or kids (maybe if we were much older and their kids were all grown up, I'd be flexible on the existing kids thing). So that heavily tanks my chances there. There's also the fact that I've never had any real desires for a real person beyond passing fancies and fantasies (only know I'm not aromantic due to having some fictional "waifus" (I'm heteromantic, which also hurts my chances) and thoughts and desires in my head about having a relationship). There's also my personal failures like being broke, lazy, fat, ugly, stupid, uncharismatic, usive, abusive, depressed, a shit person, etc. I'm also past prime desirability (in my early 30s) and have no real prior experience, so me thinking about relationships at this point is essentially childish.

A few women have expressed interest in me (mostly online in dedicated ace dating spaces), but I don't know what they even saw in me. I never feel like I know any of the gals on these places enough to actually want to pursue them. I liked to do a "screening and building rapport" phase before actually trying to go further, since I think a good relationship needs a solid friendship behind it as well (we wouldn't have gotten to that in a short amount of time, but even an acquaintanceship before actually dating would be better than nothing). I also just felt like a creep going over these women's profiles. And I might just be. And even if I wasn't they might think that anyways. By removing myself from the dating pool, I allow those other women that little extra chance they can actually find a decent person.

Relationships, from what I have seen and heard from others, also seem very cutthroat and generally flawed. Happy relationships can and do exist, but they seem to be the exception to the rule. At least, until people date many people to find someone that works for them. I hold no illusions that I'll ever get a healthy one. Especially with how many people seem to bitch about their relationships. I'm already low on the totem pole. Outside normal peoples' desirabilities. Maybe if I wasn't asexual, there'd be some chance I could find someone after a long time searching. But since sex seems to be the most important factor for most people for a relationship, yeah...

There's also trauma from growing up. When I was young, my parents seemed to try ship me near every gal my age. Shit might be just annoying for some, but it was traumatizing for me. Felt like I couldn't talk to gals my age without my parents trying to ship me. I came to calling myself asexual on my own (before I knew it was a thing), and then hoarded calling myself aro when I learned what it was (to be fair, I've always had low romantic drives, I suppose. But even growing up, I think in hindsight I had my thoughts and feelings. And my "waifus". Hell, I even had a preschool "girlfriend") Then came my parents' divorce. It was almost entirely my dad's fault and he's now the worst person I personally know (there's worse, but I don't personally know Trump, for instance). It didn't help my view of relationships and the drama and trauma a failed one could bring. Even with my mom's stable and working relationship with my stepdad, yeah. Not every relationship can be like their's. And of my biological parents, my mom was the greater "offender" with "shipping me with other gals my age". She's calmed down now and took the time I came out to her about my specifics well. And she's honored my requests to not talk about it if I don't want to (I've never talked to her about it again.). Still, she bothers my younger siblings with the "shipping" so she's not entirely learned her lesson...

The one time I kind of tried dating was in 2024 when I talking to some gal and in my "screening" phase (I'm upfront with that). She had her problems and mental issues, but I don't think I made it worse (I'll never know, for reasons I'll say shortly). And she sent some red flags, which she was aware of "love bombing". Well, eventually, she ghosted me some day after a month of not talking to me (she said she needed some time to herself, which I obliged). She never told me why and I didn't care enough to "hunt" her down. When we were talking, she'd keep asking if I was annoyed or angry at her. I wasn't until she ghosted me. And even then, I'm not really that angry or upset at her. More just annoyed. I don't wish to talk to her again, but I wish her the best in life. In retrospect, I don't think it ever would have worked and wouldn't have been a good fit, but that "farce" of sorts was a bit depressing. And likely to happen again if I try again.

In summation, a combination of me being a shit person, extremely low desirability, having a niche orientation, trauma, other people having terrible experiences, a failed attempt, and more are reasons I shouldn't date. I'd put my desirability around MAGAs and incels, even though I'm neither. I have a battle in my brain between sides that want a relationship and those that don't (for whatever reason). The "pro-relationship" side used to give me lots of mental pain for saying never, but, while it still does, years of attacking it and out-logic-ing it have eased those punishments (though that battle in of itself has caused trauma). It still thinks that a forever single life seems kind of boring and pointless. But when I'm such a terrible person and the odds massively stacked against me and so much trauma, what's the point? Others can live single just fine (which I'm kind of envious of, even if I'm single and can handle being single, just part of my mind would like a relationship), why not me?

https://www.resetera.com/threads/dating-has-gotten-so-expensive-that-nearly-half-of-u-s-singles-say-it’s-no-longer-worth-it-as-the-average-night-out-approaches-200.1518157/page-5#post-154896214

Member only:
https://www.resetera.com/threads/mental-health-era-ot2-community-and-understanding.95803/page-96#post-154769833

I'm some fucking shithead that is in the running for one of the worst humans to ever exist (like, on the level of Trump, Hitler, Stalin, Mao, Leopold 2, Putin, Netanyahu, the Kims etc.). I am so utterly, completely dogshit with basically nothing to offer. I'm stupid; a failure; usive, abusive; broke; uncharismatic; don't do anything meaningful better than anyone else; fat; disabled; broke; skilless; a pariah; a cretin; a coward; lazy; picky; useless; imperfect; and so much more. I ruin social relationships all the fucking time with my own actions. I have achieved essentially nothing with my life when you're expected to have it all figured by 18 and it feels like basically everyone else is instantly successful. I punish myself for my shittiness, but it's never enough. And I'd think that people would love me self-bashing myself, yet for some reason, 99% of people dislike it. Despite my shittiness; despite the world being filled with cruel and sadistic people; despite people loving it in middle school... am I just not finding the right people? Why do people not appreciate me bringing justice to myself when no one else will?

I also struggle at times if wondering if the far right is "correct". I have little confidence and self-esteem and they sound "smart" and confident. Plus they just hate me for being me. Nothing I can do will ever be good for them for my innate traits (being autistic and asexual in this case), so I guess it's kind of validating to know that there's people who avoid the same tired optimistic platitudes about me ("you have 'value'", "you're too hard on yourself", and other crap I've heard a million times). They'd be willing to torture me for my failures and maybe even kill me. Yet I never hang around them. I'm scared of them and they're quite frankly otherwise generally disgusting. Yet I'm just so damned bad and there's not enough justice being done against me that, yeah. Plus they already won in the US and run the country... little I can do against them at this point. The world they seek sounds awful and boring, with the added caveat that they would never accept me (like it would turn out well even if they did... fascists eat themselves... it's a part of their ideology).

I keep hoping that my self-hatred will bear better fruit. That someone will actually like it (some do agree with my points about myself, at least). Yeah, I've destroyed so many relationships over it; tormented myself endlessly (though it's on and off at times... I still need some neutrality to get things done); have had depression since I was very young; etc. But I have to bring justice to an otherwise innately horrible human being (and I hold hypocritical double standards against myself to hate myself more... I'm not usually so harsh on myself). And any time I've tried "optimism", it's blown up in my face and I had my normal beliefs about myself reaffirmed. But when will others like me for my self-torment?

https://www.resetera.com/threads/welcome-new-members-introduce-yourself-here.119184/page-45#post-143146959

Hey everyone. I got approved like a month ago, but didn't check the appropriate email until like an hour ago. Hey all o/. I'm just some random guy. :')

[Gameboy Nostalgia]

I don't think this is an absolute rule, but I think by and large the people who hate on Hasan (on the left) simply haven't spent enough time listening to him.

This is always a funny claim, especially from people who don't offer this grace to anyone they've written off over a single slight, because it dismisses the possibility that the more you pay attention the worse your opinion would get. Hasan's Nazi Site account is bad enough. All the puff pieces make him look stupid. Actually watching his streams for some time will just confirm how dumb he is:


Yet their defenses of him isn't that he's entertaining or that he has his finger on the pulse of a niche population, instead they want to defend him as some kind of intellectual and historically great political thinker. At the same time they also want to deny his probably daily calls for violence or saying that the ideal for America is that it should become a totalitarian police state. They, and he, rush to claim this is just humor you don't get when he's clearly earnest and his sole principle is that people he doesn't like should receive violence and people he likes should receive the proceeds of their victims labor.

I have listened to enough Hasan and it made my opinion of him even worse. Hasan is the most lukewarm leftist out there. They say he's here to push baby leftists in the right direction but that's absolutely false. He's pushing them to continue supporting established Democrats. This is the guy who refused to stream on Bilibili after realizing he no longer could commentate on twitter posts, spends hours whining about Asmongold, and cares more about his view count than actual message.

Hasan is literally there for the lazy SocDem who lacks the cognitive ability to read the fucking news for themselves. 

[Hap Shaughnessy]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/georgia-woman-who-chased-gunned-down-black-man-who-was-in-a-hit-and-run-accident-with-another-motorist-may-walk-free-because-of-ai.1518322/

ACAB.

[Hap Shaughnessy]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/anyone-else-just%E2%80%A6-tired-of-life.1517557/#post-154881388

Life would be great if half the fucking people in this country didn't exist.

[Hap Shaughnessy]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/michael-jackson-estate-faces-new-sexual-abuse-allegations-from-four-siblings-who-claim-they-were-%E2%80%98groomed-and-brainwashed%E2%80%99-by-pop-superstar.1501432/page-3#post-154812808

 User banned (3 months): dismissive commentary toward accusations of sexual assault

Remember this kind of pedophile apologia the next time anyone tries to claim Era is a progressive community.

If you prove he is a pedophile, I retreat my comment.

[benji]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/trump-americans-financial-situation-i-dont-think-about-anybody-i-think-about-one-thing-we-cannot-let-iran-have-a-nuclear-weapon-thats-all.1518094/page-3#post-154893229

I don't agree with nuclear proliferation in a vacuum and would much prefer a world with no nukes. However, we don't live in a vacuum and I ultimately want the West to get out of the Global South and stop trampling on the autonomy of other countries and the environment for personal gain for the capitalist class. If Global South countries decide to pursue nuclear armament to achieve that autonomy, so be it at this point. I'm not afraid of a nuclear Iran. Ultimately, if we want a nuclear-less world, then we need to fight against the class of folks constantly pushing the world to the breaking point in the first place. Capitalism and imperialism need to go before we can think of mutual disarmament.

How's the pursuit of nuclear arms been working out for the autonomy of Iran?  

Does she really think Global South nations are going to be allowed to violate their signatures on the Non-Proliferation Treaty and obtain nuclear weapons while saying they're going to smuggle them into nuke civilians in the West for the purposes of trying to halt global trade? How much social welfare does she think these countries should abandon to be able to afford acquiring and enriching uranium?  

Member only:
https://www.resetera.com/threads/mental-health-era-ot2-community-and-understanding.95803/page-96#post-154769833

I'm some fucking shithead that is in the running for one of the worst humans to ever exist (like, on the level of Trump, Hitler, Stalin, Mao, Leopold 2, Putin, Netanyahu, the Kims etc.). 

Damn, this dude really thinks highly of himself.

[benji]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/georgia-woman-who-chased-gunned-down-black-man-who-was-in-a-hit-and-run-accident-with-another-motorist-may-walk-free-because-of-ai.1518322/

ACAB.

AI is fucking evil.

Can't even blame the fucking hack prosecutor who did it.    

[Let's Cyber]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/dating-has-gotten-so-expensive-that-nearly-half-of-u-s-singles-say-it%E2%80%99s-no-longer-worth-it-as-the-average-night-out-approaches-200.1518157/page-7#post-154899166

i knew this was a entremet thread without even reading who the op was lol

 

[Gameboy Nostalgia]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/michael-jackson-estate-faces-new-sexual-abuse-allegations-from-four-siblings-who-claim-they-were-%E2%80%98groomed-and-brainwashed%E2%80%99-by-pop-superstar.1501432/page-3#post-154812808

 User banned (3 months): dismissive commentary toward accusations of sexual assault

Remember this kind of pedophile apologia the next time anyone tries to claim Era is a progressive community.

If you prove he is a pedophile, I retreat my comment.

they sure proved he's a pedophile with that.

[Mask]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/michael-jackson-estate-faces-new-sexual-abuse-allegations-from-four-siblings-who-claim-they-were-%E2%80%98groomed-and-brainwashed%E2%80%99-by-pop-superstar.1501432/page-3#post-154812808

 User banned (3 months): dismissive commentary toward accusations of sexual assault

Remember this kind of pedophile apologia the next time anyone tries to claim Era is a progressive community.

If you prove he is a pedophile, I retreat my comment.

Good ol' "dismissive commentary" with completely arbitrary ban lengths. Nothing beats that.

[D3RANG3D]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/anyone-else-just%E2%80%A6-tired-of-life.1517557/#post-154881388

Life would be great if half the fucking people in this country didn't exist.

[nachobro]

link

Are you associating Rashid with Saudi blood money, you racist?!
 

thats shaheen, racist 

[Nintex]

praise be allah

[Gameboy Nostalgia]

[Hap Shaughnessy]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/new-subforum-sales-ccu.1505911/page-4#post-154473451

Good call. Hopefully, this will help keep CCU and sales threads on topic and readable. All the threadwhining was getting to me a little.

lol, the Marathon ccu thread is easily the most ridiculously over moderated thread I have ever seen. People can't even be challenged for that thread claiming the game is already dead without getting banned, but it's getting to you?

I lurked that thread from start to finish, and the reasonable detractors weren't the ones getting actioned. If you disagree, then I'm sure the mods would love to hear from you here.

ive already asked the mods to delete my account as this isn't the forum for reasonable discussion anymore

[Hap Shaughnessy]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/marathons-daily-ccu-peak-is-now-under-16k-on-steam-out-of-the-top-100-most-played-on-xbox-in-all-regions-barely-any-better-on-ps-what-went-wrong.1505815/page-28#post-154510774

It's such a mind boggling mentality to me. Someone in the stickied thread about this new subforum actually asked to be banned and their account deleted because these Marathon CCU threads made them so angry.

Over a CCU thread that can easily be ignored?

https://www.resetera.com/threads/marathons-daily-ccu-peak-is-now-under-16k-on-steam-out-of-the-top-100-most-played-on-xbox-in-all-regions-barely-any-better-on-ps-what-went-wrong.1505815/page-29#post-154521286

 User Banned (1 Week): Ablesist Commentary; Account in Junior Phase

there are mental health crises all around for those with eyes to see

[Vertigo]

Wtf is this the Harson of BCT on Gaf & Reee 'fame'?

Its crazy how many of these Gaf then Ree guys became trans. 

Glad I transitioned. Even though I primarily dated women, I'd say 70-80% of people I went on dates with insisted on paying for everything instead of splitting or letting me pay even if I damn near begged Lol. I'm in a 10+ month relationship at the moment, thank God, so there's less expectation to impress each other with needlessly expensive nights out on the regular.

https://www.resetera.com/threads/dating-has-gotten-so-expensive-that-nearly-half-of-u-s-singles-say-it%E2%80%99s-no-longer-worth-it-as-the-average-night-out-approaches-200.1518157/post-154898839

[filler]

[xiceman191]

Playing fighting games only for single player content makes you a massive pussy anyway. 

Take them skillz online and git gud breh 

Single-Player focus in fighting games

[simiansmarts]

I swear they have only two personality types: horny sex porn hentai man and depression

[Rendle]

Lot of overlap too

[benji]

Wtf is this the Harson of BCT on Gaf & Reee 'fame'?

Its crazy how many of these Gaf then Ree guys became trans. 

Glad I transitioned. Even though I primarily dated women, I'd say 70-80% of people I went on dates with insisted on paying for everything instead of splitting or letting me pay even if I damn near begged Lol. I'm in a 10+ month relationship at the moment, thank God, so there's less expectation to impress each other with needlessly expensive nights out on the regular.

https://www.resetera.com/threads/dating-has-gotten-so-expensive-that-nearly-half-of-u-s-singles-say-it%E2%80%99s-no-longer-worth-it-as-the-average-night-out-approaches-200.1518157/post-154898839

I swear they have only two personality types: horny sex porn hentai man and depression

Lot of overlap too

Same shit as always:




"subtle"



According to other of the many posts like this, he also lost 115 pounds right before starting HRT. Obviously ascribes all his "success" to HRT.
https://www.reddit.com/user/iareharSon/submitted/

[Potato]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/ive-just-been-hired-at-a-video-game-school.1517431/#post-154884238

Congrats. I'm in the job market search and it's hell. Glad you found your way out. I seem to have too many accolades and am probably coming off as overqualified or something is snagging my ability to get noticed in today's job market

Dr Nothing Loud: "What do you mean God Emperor of Mankind is not a job title that exists in your organisation? Have you not seen my PhD?"

Interviewer: "Please leave the interview room."

Dr NL: "What? Is it because I am overqualified?"

Interviewer: "Oh God, he's putting the LED lights behind the TV again. Sir, this is a Wendy's."

[simiansmarts]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/ive-just-been-hired-at-a-video-game-school.1517431/#post-154884238

Congrats. I'm in the job market search and it's hell. Glad you found your way out. I seem to have too many accolades and am probably coming off as overqualified or something is snagging my ability to get noticed in today's job market

Dr Nothing Loud: "What do you mean God Emperor of Mankind is not a job title that exists in your organisation? Have you not seen my PhD?"

Interviewer: "Please leave the interview room."

Dr NL: "What? Is it because I am overqualified?"

Interviewer: "Oh God, he's putting the LED lights behind the TV again. Sir, this is a Wendy's."

  
I bet he dresses like this for every interview and wonders why he can't get a job. 

[benji]

It's really sweet of you guys to pretend he even gets to the interview stage.

[Let's Cyber]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/ive-just-been-hired-at-a-video-game-school.1517431/#post-154884238

Dr Nothing Loud: "What do you mean God Emperor of Mankind is not a job title that exists in your organisation? Have you not seen my PhD?"

Interviewer: "Please leave the interview room."

Dr NL: "What? Is it because I am overqualified?"

Interviewer: "Oh God, he's putting the LED lights behind the TV again. Sir, this is a Wendy's."

  
I bet he dresses like this for every interview and wonders why he can't get a job. 

Interviewer: So what are some of your interests outside of work?
Dr. Nothing Loud:

[Potato]

 
 

Ummm, chuddie, there are AT LEAST 9 of us.

[Taco Bell Tower]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/new-subforum-sales-ccu.1505911/page-4#post-154473451

Good call. Hopefully, this will help keep CCU and sales threads on topic and readable. All the threadwhining was getting to me a little.

lol, the Marathon ccu thread is easily the most ridiculously over moderated thread I have ever seen. People can't even be challenged for that thread claiming the game is already dead without getting banned, but it's getting to you?

I lurked that thread from start to finish, and the reasonable detractors weren't the ones getting actioned. If you disagree, then I'm sure the mods would love to hear from you here.

ive already asked the mods to delete my account as this isn't the forum for reasonable discussion anymore

Oh, sure someone less than 1k post gets his account deleted instantly but when fat4all does it the process takes a month.