Journal of Other Forum Analysis (Volume II, Issue 2)

[davepoobond]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/my-wife-of-9-years-wants-a-divorce-and-im-struggling-so-damn-much.1459723/

I contemplated suicide but figured I wouldn't be good enough to succeed and that she would be stuck taking care of a vegetable. So I didn't. I'm here still.

 

This dude spent twelve years writing a romance novel?

excerpt from the novel:
"i thought about confessing my love to her, but i thought it wouldnt be good enough, so instead I didn't"

[Besticus Maximus]

I have been unceremoniously dumped  for being shit. Here is a 6000 word history of why the bitch needs to get a better grasp of the truth.

[Hap Shaughnessy]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/critics-being-encourage-to-delay-marathon-reviews-until-later-in-the-month.1454905/page-6#post-152211175

 User banned (3 weeks): Trolling and hostility. Long history of similar behavior.

Different games in the same genre, what are you talking about?

Wasn't an attack, just an educated guess based on your posts.

Buddy I haven't played a Bungie game since a few days of Destiny 1 around launch, sounds like your education is flawed and rushed. But I am a bit gleeful that I got you riled up enough you felt you needed to stab in the dark.

[HaughtyFrank]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/most-americans-view-each-other-as-morally-bad-canada-is-the-polar-opposite-in-new-first-of-its-kind-25-nation-survey-on-morality-by-pew-research.1454947/page-3#post-152219308

Weird seeing some of the takes in here. A lot of people are bringing up how many Canadians are racist. Yes, that is true, unfortunately. But what does this have to do with the poll? Could this have varied by race? Maybe, but people aren't racist because they think that the majority of other people of other races are bad people. They're racist because they are ignorant and uncomfortable seeing people who don't look like them or follow their religion. They want to be around "their own kind". That's shitty enough on its own, but it doesn't necessarily mean they think that people of other races are bad. They just don't want them around. Again, it's reprehensible, but for different reasons.

 User Banned (2 Weeks): Downplaying and Justifying Bigotry

But he didn't justify bigotry...

[BIONIC]

If we are talking about it, I thought Cyberpunk did a better job making it spicy, unique, and still quite respectful to what it was shown (Judy was affectionate, River is cozy, Panam's a little wild, and you and Kerry fool around while you setting a boat on fire-- that's awesome!). I don't understand the obsession with ostensibly having a full sex scene, I thought these 'edited vignettes' were cut and performed in a more interesting way.

Cyberpunk, respectful? The same Cyberpunk that forces an interminable first-person sex scene as Johnny Silverhand (because that's really what I'm looking for when I created a female V, a cishet male POV sex scene in first person that lasts several minutes), and that later has a side-quest (optional, but gating the gay male romance option unlock) where Silverhand takes over your V and uses V's body to finger a random girl, effectively sexually assaulting V? The same Cyberpunk that treated its male romance options as completely afterthoughts?

Hell no. Fuck that game. I have zero faith Witcher 4 won't be anything but trashy and male-gazey either.

+1 to Cyberpunk 2077 having a good sex sequence with Judy in particular. Shit was too good, albeit short. I think depictions of sex and physical intimacy still have a ways to go in video games. The Darkness of all games is still kinda peak relationship intimacy to me. That sequence of Jacky and Jennie just being snuggled up on the couch together for as long as the player wants while To Kill a Mockingbird and other stuff is playing on the TV is still peak to me.

This is longer than I wanted it to be but...

I said 'better job' not perfect. (And I don't recall if CP2077 scenes are skippable but I'd be down for that too FWIW).
CP actually tries to make the characters unique and varied; and I like that it has straight and queer options on both sides and will even reject you than 'turn gay/straight for you' (understandably there's still mixed results, but the dating pool isn't deep).

I don't see it as a major/important adjunct in the game either, just something for personal preference and for fun (you can ignore it completely; but it's nice they did add an extra "come to my place" date in an update). I also enjoyed the rather romantic angle played with Judy; and I even liked that Kerry rejected me. Like, what else was it supposed to do? Sure there's coulda been more, but I don't imagine the love interest aspect as a high-priority selling point for CP2077 either.

What I DO like is the 1st person perspective throwing you into things (er, not just for sex but stuff like hacking, receiving calls, or just having cool/intimate 1-on-1 conversations with people). I also like that there's 4 separate quest lines related to them. I like the more creative editing that helps avoid polygons awkwardly grinding (this is genuinely why I hate most game sex scenes 😂😭) and instead creatively shows "parts of the night" than anything too specific or revealing. 😅 And I like it's not JUST a generic cutscene or basic "fade to black" (the Cyberpunk genre would never :P ), but the dates were proper "hangout missions" that showed a different side of each character: River has you meet his family; Judy takes you scuba diving; Panam takes you for a ride and we do the car-sex thing; and Kerry lets you commit a little light arsony --- I can't be mad at any of those.

Johnny having big dumb rockstar sex with his girlfriend goes a bit long, but it's still under a minute ('bout the same length as the rest IIRC), and ties into them fighting and pointing out he's an asshole anyways. Rogue is in her 80s[!] (IMO a unique point of its own) and when you 'date' her it's V giving Johnny permission to do so (and takes a super sci-fi pill to 'fade out' for a few hours and let Johnny take over; but again, all three were mutual and understanding about it). But the Rogue date also ends pretty poorly since the ladies don't wanna follow Johnny on whatever road he's tripping on (Alt still joined him and died for it; while Rogue simply moved on). I really didn't find this that bad (at the very least I have seen worse). And Johnny is cishet, so yeah I get it sucks to watch, but it's...in character, I guess. :S (A weak point. I know)

I'm gonna be honest I don't remember fingering a random girl. Nor can I find it through a google search (partly because actual CP2077 porn has proliferated searches lol). But I'm also not defending Johnny's character. He's interesting but to a fault, and is 100% framed as a dangerous shithead (with the usual "Walter White" issue where the wrong types will find him great anyways).

Kerry's questline is short (even if I did like him too), but Panam is a lot of fun and don't think she was a bad romance option at all. Not sure why the beef there TBH. o.O (Arguably the ending where you team with her and the Aldecaldos is "the happiest one").

I'm also not gonna defend Witcher's use of it (at least not the older games use of it) but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't laughing AT my buddy for choosing to sleep with Yen AND Triss ending with hilarious results . 🤷‍♀️ Also the scene where Yen and Geralt get romantic on top of a stuffed unicorn because she has ....a weird kink about it (Geralt doesn't get it but obliges her anyway).... I dunno, it's a bit funny too IMO.

Believe me, I really have a low opinion of "video game sex". But I don't HATE what they did here. CDPR has problems with characters and representation, but I wouldn't list these as the worst from the studio. I take way bigger issues with the games with half-assed romantic harems, or better than watching David Cage write crappy characters engage in awkward QTE sex, or Kratos looking/being a deviant while some random goddess eagerly wants to bang that.


Butt different strokes n' all that.

I also think Saints Row IV is probably one of the other instances I've "liked" video game sex (if you know you know – but basically it doesn't treat it as seriously at all and I can gel with that... so I'm maybe not the best opinion on this to begin with).

Panam is written with male V in mind so much that she behaves identically towards female V and even flirts with her unsolicited. She only "oh yeah no I don't want you in that way" at the last moment if you try to reciprocate as a female V, it's pretty ridiculous tbh.
River is a bland cop with zero personality and his story couldn't be more inconsequential, and is Kerry is unlocked super late and gated behind that gross side-quest I mentioned.

The "queer options" are only good for F/F, really. Because they fleshed out the female love interests, and had their stories tie into the main storyline. The male ones are complete afterthoughts.


...
This is not a serious comment, sorry. Might as well say this about Baldur's Gate 3. 🤣 This is a game where you can customize your genitals as a selling point lol


But why am I forced to play it in that POV, in a role-playing game where you create your own character with your own preferences etc? Again, the answer is simply the male gaze.


???? Absolutely not?? V gives permission to Johnny to take over so he can go talk to Rogue for a specific mission, and this is the understanding behind her agreement; V absolutely doesn't give Johnny permission to trash V's body by getting wasted, kissing and groping girls and doing all sorts of sleazy shit while he takes over...

What Johnny does is essentially sexual assault on V and the whole thing is played for laughs.


I reloaded the game right when it was about to happen, but at one point he (using V's body still, obviously) gets into a car with a girl and starts groping her and is clearly about to finger her. As V's player I sure didn't consent to my V doing any of that shit so I reloaded to before I started that whole thing and never finished the side quest (and so never met Kerry because he's after this), because having V being violated like that pissed me off. I almost uninstalled the game right then.


Meh, just because the bar is in hell doesn't mean CDPR games aren't still full of tacky sexism. The only times video game sex scenes weren't so shit was probably Wolfenstein, TLoU2 and Baldur's Gate 3. I struggle to think of other examples...


lol. Yes I feel very empowered seeing the camera zoom in on her crotch like that.

Yeah, that's definitely the single worst substantial/canon side quest in all of CP2077. Johnny absolutes takes advantage of V's trust to do whatever he wants when blanket consent was not given. It's very much written by men for men as it's all very much meant to be humorous to men right down to the tattoo of regret. It's absolutely horrifying from a woman's point of view. I only stomached it because I knew what happened beforehand.

Curious that burqa brigade leaders have literal encyclopediac knowledge of Cyberpunk 2077. I thought it did such extreme psychic damage to trans members that it had to be relegated to the shadow realm

[benji]

But he didn't justify bigotry...

It's the parts where he says its "shitty enough" and "reprehensible" that clue you into how he justifies it.

[benji]

It's absolutely horrifying from a woman's point of view. I only stomached it because I knew what happened beforehand.

[EaldNarche]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/my-wife-of-9-years-wants-a-divorce-and-im-struggling-so-damn-much.1459723/

I contemplated suicide but figured I wouldn't be good enough to succeed and that she would be stuck taking care of a vegetable. So I didn't. I'm here still.

 

This dude spent twelve years writing a romance novel?

12 years and his soon to be ex-wife won't even read it. 

[Jansen]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/marathon-steam-ccu-thread.1455688/page-59#post-152440114

[Hap Shaughnessy]

Ryan is still scheduled to come home on Tuesday if we don't get too much more snow which fingers crossed we don't.

Was he institutionalized?

[HaughtyFrank]

It's absolutely horrifying from a woman's point of view. I only stomached it because I knew what happened beforehand.

They're right. As a man is just don't know what it's like to have a rockerboy whose consciousness is implanted on a chip take over your brain and use your body. Meanwhile for women this is basically everyday. I need to sit down and listen

[benji]

Low CCU just means the potential for growth. Look at the problem Highguard had thanks to Geoff, millions of users on day one most of whom hated it rather than taking time to grow by word of mouth while spending expecting Apex numbers. The key is to not give in to hatemobs and continue funding the games no matter what the cost until the chuds are defeated and then the CCU numbers will grow.

[Hap Shaughnessy]

Member only:
https://www.resetera.com/threads/i-plan-to-kill-myself-soon.1457437/page-5#post-152427949

We deeply sympathize with OP, and we're so happy to see the outpouring of support from our members. We highly encourage OP to reach out to their local suicide hotlines for additional support.

[jooseloose]

They're absolutely tying themselves in knots in the burka thread to completely disregard anything Alanah Pearce says. It's pathetic  Some of the posts would be bannable if they were outside the protective bubble that thread has.

Also bonus post from Princess Bubblegum:

For those that have played Requiem, does Leon overshadow Grace? Is Grace a worthwhile (co)protagonist with equal screen time?

"Does the disgusting MAN get more screen time that Grace uWu? I've not played the game, I just need to know"

She hates men so much  I'd ask how the fuck a weirdo like that is allowed to be a mod but then I remember what website I'm talking about.

[benji]

Let's just say it, Alanah Pearce, friend of Asmongold, is whoring herself out to male capital-G Gamers and throwing women (especially trans women) under the bus and pulling up the ladder behind her.

[Hap Shaughnessy]

Also bonus post from Princess Bubblegum:

For those that have played Requiem, does Leon overshadow Grace? Is Grace a worthwhile (co)protagonist with equal screen time?

"Does the disgusting MAN get more screen time that Grace uWu? I've not played the game, I just need to know"

She hates men so much  I'd ask how the fuck a weirdo like that is allowed to be a mod but then I remember what website I'm talking about.

https://www.resetera.com/threads/developer-of-delivery-truck-management-game-honcho-adds-an-option-to-play-as-a-sentient-block-of-male-tofu-after-complaints-about-a-woman-protagonist.1458406/

[benji]

I'd ask how the fuck a weirdo like that is allowed to be a mod but then I remember what website I'm talking about.

When you're a staff member you're allowed to wish married women were lesbians and lament that women characters have romantic relationships with Black men.

[benji]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/developer-of-delivery-truck-management-game-honcho-adds-an-option-to-play-as-a-sentient-block-of-male-tofu-after-complaints-about-a-woman-protagonist.1458406/

I like that the article makes it seem like someone went out of their way to complain about playing as a female character on steam's forums when that is 95% of all content posted on steam forums.

I thought it was excerpts from Mein Kampf?

[Boredfrom]

I'd ask how the fuck a weirdo like that is allowed to be a mod but then I remember what website I'm talking about.

When you're a staff member you're allowed to wish married women were lesbians and lament that women characters have romantic relationships with Black men.

Or you can openly say that you can tell when someone is a lesbo for her tastes in video games and elves.

[Hap Shaughnessy]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/magnificent-others-billy-corgan-interviews-melissa-auf-der-maur.1460164/#post-152443294

Isn't Billy Corgan a fucking asshole?

[Jansen]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/where-the-hell-is-bluey-season-4.1460128/

Going on 2 years since "The Sign" ripped out my heart and made me weep like a teenage break-up.



And to be clear, I'm not asking for my kids or the grandkids or my wife. I'M ASKING FOR ME!!!



Where my dogs at?

Probably not coming back cuz y'all are creeps 

[Hap Shaughnessy]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/the-laid-off-scientists-and-lawyers-training-ai-to-steal-their-careers.1459522/

If they're laid off is it still their career?

[Boredfrom]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/chainsaw-man-part-2-ot-the-finger-bang-is-really-all-powerful-open-manga-spoilers.606657/page-271#post-152431093

Context: All things point out that Chainsaw Man Part2 is going to have a terrible ending, after people mocked JJK second attempt of ending. Many nerds are salty with other nerds:

To be honest if this whole thing destroys CSM popularity, I'll be pretty ok with that lol. The fame/popularity that it has gotten has lead to a tiring parade of people wanting to make sure you know that they believe it is objectively garbage instead of them just not liking it. Same reason I kinda hope Fire Punch never gets an anime because due to it's lack of fame I can enjoy it and talk about the joy I've gotten from it without starting a countdown before someone decides they want to yuck my yum.

For how exhausted I am of hobbiest/fandom discourse I wonder why I stick to a forum dedicated to that exact subject for so many years lol.

Also doesn't help that I'm a hypocrite lol.

Almost like you have posters and mods encouraging this discourse.

[benji]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/where-the-hell-is-bluey-season-4.1460128/

Going on 2 years since "The Sign" ripped out my heart and made me weep like a teenage break-up.



And to be clear, I'm not asking for my kids or the grandkids or my wife. I'M ASKING FOR ME!!!



Where my dogs at?

I'm not emotionally prepared for Bluey in "Big School" but the LORE implications are fascinating!

[Chudder Barbarity]

sexy child pornography 

pretty sus choice of words there benji. Not surprising it's coming from the same dude whose website has a setting titled "User CP Home".

[Vertigo]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/magnificent-others-billy-corgan-interviews-melissa-auf-der-maur.1460164/#post-152443294

Isn't Billy Corgan a fucking asshole?

Was just coming to post this. My god, these miserable fucks cant help themselves.

[benji]

sexy child pornography 

pretty sus choice of words there benji. Not surprising it's coming from the same dude whose website has a setting titled "User CP Home".

[benji]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/the-laid-off-scientists-and-lawyers-training-ai-to-steal-their-careers.1459522/

After college, she'd struggled to make a living as a freelance journalist, gone to grad school, then pivoted to what she hoped would be a more stable career in content marketing

If this underclass of highly educated workers stops feeding the machine the output will just nosedive. Same with content moderation. They aren't going to magically get "Gen AI" and have it bootstrap itself without these inputs.

This bubble can't burst quick enough.

This shit is everywhere. My company is pushing us to automate everything and I'm a contractor so I know I won't get rehired next year.
My partner had to fight hard to get a job that wasn't ass in marketing and now the small startup he's at has a ceo pushing everyone to use Claude and have Claude training days.

And for what? A raise? No. The working class is going to to be phased out.

You're not the working class buddy. (Also, marketing again lol)

Love how not a single person, politician or corporate leader, has said what will happen after AI takes all the white collar jobs. We're either going to get nuked or all lose our jobs. Why get out of bed in the morning.

The conversation around Universal Basic Income needs to have happened yesterday. We're not stopping this train.

I'm still fully in the belief that the only solution in the end is a post-work society, but there's going to be a whole lot of ballache leading up to that point regardless of whether that even happens.

Yep. I completely agree with that. Society is going to have to completely reorient itself. The usual obstacles will be people in power and the wealthy. We'll end up with a modern feudalist system if action isn't taken.

I wish all the billionaires could simultaneously cease to exist. I hate the future we're building. That was an extremely dark and sad article.

We're going to have some really dark times upcoming

the fires will light the way for a while until the burning stops
then yeah, it'll be dark for a while.

unless...

we could decide to boin capitalism down foist...

Nah the only solution is to burn down the data centers, break up big tech, seize billionaire assets and redistribute the wealth

This is the better option. Establish fair, progressive rules of competition that force the outliers (both high and low) towards the middle at increasing intensity the further away from the middle they go.

You only deserve to be very rich if you can continually produce crazy life-alternating positive productivity that increases the real life Standard of Living across the entirety of the population.

I would argue from a cultural and national security viewpoint allowing any private entity to create anything that can replace all business and art is something that shouldn't exist. Eventually no one will have the skills to do the things we have replaced with AI and then we are beholden to those companies for our survival. The companies should be beholden us for their survival.

 

1. Destroy all global wealth, outlaw all future wealth and prevent any automation.
2. ???
3. UBI for all and nobody ever has to work.

thing is, UBI won't solve capitalism. Hell, we have UBI-like programs in countries with rampant misery and inequality. it's pretty much a non factor

Oh, thank god, the Marxist who has never read Marx is here.

Is anyone able to gift a link so I can read the whole article? So I can send this to my lawyer wife.

Poor woman.

[Potato]

https://www.resetera.com/threads/my-wife-of-9-years-wants-a-divorce-and-im-struggling-so-damn-much.1459723/

My wife and I began dating more than 14 years ago, our first year in college. A storybook start to a fantastic relationship. January 2012, our friends were playing beer pong, she and I were both the third wheel and sitting at a bench watching. I started talking to her, and she was so damn cool. The next weekend she came to my dorm to visit me and when I went to let her in, I saw her through the doorway standing waiting, and I didn't know it then, but that's the day I fell in love.



My childhood was horrible. My one goal in life, I told myself as a 12 year old after seeing my father physically abuse my mother and sister, was to have a marriage, have a family, and never get divorced. I wanted to be a father and a husband and never, ever split my family. I vowed to myself as a child. That was what I wanted. I didn't care then, and I still don't care, what job I have or how much money I make. I just want a family that loves.



In the summer of 2012, we did the long-distance thing and traveled back and forth and she said she loved me first. It was the greatest feeling in the world, hearing that from someone who isn't a parent or a sibling.



At some point that summer she did something to offend her stepmother and was kicked out of her father's house. She had to move in with her grandparents, and her relationship with her father completely fell apart.



Because of finances, we both took time off from school for the fall semester of 2012, then when we both went back, we moved in to an apartment together off-campus after dating for about 10 months. We lived together in that college town for more than 3 years as I finished school. She had dropped out because she wasn't sure what major to pursue, and worked full-time to support us both. We worked at the same daycare facility, though with different ages and different hours. We went on bike rides and played tennis and long walks. We watched movies and cuddled and played video games sometimes. We were happy. It was a simple life but we were so happy. I got an idea to write a book and started it then. This part is important later.



The last summer before I graduated, August 2016, we got married. She was 22, I was 21. We were poor college students, and got married at her grandparent's small beach house. Less than 100 people were invited to the wedding, I cooked all the food, her dress was the largest expense (even more than the ring). Her father did not come to the wedding, though all of her siblings did. It was a small ceremony, but we were happy with it. I graduated in December of 2016 with the love of my life at my side.



We moved back to my hometown because a family member helped me with a job connection. That January we found out she was pregnant. I worked my entry level HR job, she got a job she sort of enjoyed as an administrative assistant at a big factory. I started coaching my younger brother in youth sports. We bought a house in May of 2017, had a quiet summer prepping the house, and our first daughter was born in September. I thought I'd made it. I thought my life was perfect. We got a dog, who is now eight and getting old. I had friends in town, my wife did not, at least at first. Her mother, who lived several hours away, pursued a dream and moved from Minnesota to Alaska.



My wife got promoted a few times into roles for more money, but more stress and she liked the jobs less and less. Our second daughter was born in November of 2019. That pregnancy was hard, physically and emotionally. We had planned to have four kids, but my wife couldn't do another one, so after the birth she made the decision to make sure she can never have kids again. I supported her, because it was the right decision and I love her. My wife's brother died. He was only a few years older than us, and had been battling alcoholism and a drug addiction and a bunch of other things. That hit us all hard, including her mother, and their relationship spiraled. Her father grew from losing his son and worked hard, so hard, to patch things up with my wife and I am so proud that they fixed things. I had to be responsible and hold things down as all of this stuff was happening in her life, and we were juggling a baby and a toddler and a dog and a new kitten. 



We did the family thing for a while. We got the toddlers into Gymnastics, we went on walks with the dog and the stroller. I thought my life was perfect. And looking back, this is probably the happiest part of my life. Era, this was so good. So good. And I want that back more than anything.



But she grew tired of having only my friends and family around, she wanted to see her grandparents in their twilight years, so we made the decision to move out of town.



In January 2022, I got a job not quite halfway between where my family is from and where hers is from. We got a house up here in May 2022. It was at the very edge of our budget. But we figured this could be our forever home. She tried the remote work thing and hated it. She already disliked her job and that made it worse. She quit that job and I supported her. She wanted to open up a daycare in our home, and I supported her. I thought it was not going to work, but I wanted so badly for her to be happy. It did not work. Half our house was her work area and she hated going in those spaces on the weekends. Her work never ended. For some stupid reason, I got us a second dog in this time frame, thinking it was what we needed. The house started having issues.



In May 2024, she closed the daycare. Between house repairs and daycare losses, we lost a lot of money. She took the summer off to spend with our young daughters, and I could tell my wife was falling into the despair of depression. She had no career at the age of 30. She had few friends, and she told me she invested so much time and effort into me and the kids, she lost herself. She had no hobbies and no interests and did not like her life. Her not working that summer blew through what little remained of our savings. But I didn't care. Truly. I'd go $1,000,000 into debt if it made her happy. I wanted her to be happy and to have time to reset. We barely made ends meet. I was so desperate to make things work for us, I grew even more reserved. I didn't want to do anything that spent money, including my hobbies of wargaming and collecting Lego and Blu-Rays. In hindsight, I truly stopped having fun. Aside from my coaching and occasional xbox with friends, I didn't do anything anymore.



I encouraged her to find who she is. I wanted to be the rock for her, to be the person she can rely on. She started venturing out with local adult-league sports. She met some friends. In September 2024, she got a job at a school as a teacher's assistant and absolutely loves it. The school has pushed her hard to finish her degree so she can be a full teacher. But the assistant job pays horribly, so she started working at Wal-Mart part-time. Almost every night she would come home from work at the school, grab food, and be gone within an hour. My kids and I barely saw her. I thought it would be temporary. She started getting into romance books. After reading maybe three books our entire relationship, she was banging out a book a week or more. I was happy she had found a hobby. We had a wonderful temporary bump in our sex life, and I thought things were great.



In January 2025, I got a call that I was wanted to move up from youth coaching to high school. I was so happy. My wife was happy for me. But I could tell something was still wrong.



In March 2025, she quit her job at Wal-Mart. I started coaching the high school team and spending more time away from family. I could tell things were distant between us, but I thought it would be okay. Summer 2025 she went on a vacation with the kids to visit her mother in Alaska. She didn't check in with me often, and two nights I didn't even get a chance to say good night to the kids. One day it started a long distance fight between us, and she ignored my calls and texts for a while. When they all came home, we had a talk. She told me she didn't feel the same way about me anymore. She loved me, but was no longer in love with me. I asked if she wanted a divorce, she said she did not want to break up our family. I asked her what I could do, and she recommended couples therapy.



My stupid ass did research online and saw in many cases it drives people apart. So I dug my heels in and said no, but we can try other things. She said okay. We talked a lot. We spent time together. Some things improved, others did not.



Our biggest fight of our marriage came in October 2025. She told me she wanted to meet up with a friend from work at the park. I didn't mind. I asked if she had an idea how long they'd be out, to plan for dinner. She said an hour or two. That evening I texted her and said dinner was ready, no need to pick anything up. No response. I texted again at bedtime for the girls, asking if she would be home soon. No response. I called her after getting the girls down, no answer. I texted later and asked if she was okay, then called again. She answered then and put me on speaker, made her friend say hi. I said I was worried about her, she said it was fine. She got home that night a bit after 10pm, after more than six hours with her friend at the park. I have no doubts that they were sitting talking. I know and trust my wife. I was just so worried and anxious about it being a park after dark and she simply never texted me back. We fought hard. I just wanted to make sure she was okay, she thought I was being overbearing and didn't trust her. It was a disaster. But we made it through and life returned to our normal.



In December 2025 we had another talk, and she said nothing had changed on her end. And in fact, she just doesn't miss me when I'm gone. She doesn't think about me, doesn't love me like that at all. It was hard to hear.



I had a breakdown after Christmas with my family, when I realized it would probably be our last as a full family. She told me things would work out okay. A few weeks later, I overheard her speaking to a friend on the phone about this stupid house we have. That she was ready to sell it, and that when (not if) we do divorce, we are going to have to co-parent and live together while selling a house. I confronted her that night, and she said she wasn't sure, but she leaned toward splitting.



I had another breakdown. Memories of my childhood, and my emotionally abusive father, and my single mom who thought I was responsible enough to raise myself...it all came back. I have had body image issues our entire relationship, and have voiced that to her more times than I can count. She has grown exhausted of that talk. I have no self-confidence, and she has grown exhausted. I got into therapy for myself, and asked my wife to join me. In our first couples session, we were asked to rate 1-10, 1 being split now, 10 being do anything to make it work, where are we. I said a 9. She said an 8. I was on cloud-9. I thought we would be okay. We can fix this. Progress, right? I finished my book. After infinite drafts and revisions and nearly 12 years of writing, I was happy enough to print out five copies and send it to two family members, two friends, and my wife to read it.



But as I'm confronting my past, and the memories of my father, and his abuse and how badly that divorce went, I've been spiraling. My wife has grown exhausted of me. We have spoken about "us" several times in the last few months. Every time she says nothing has changed. I convinced her to do a family road trip in February 2026. It was great! We have so many great pictures and experiences and memories and I thought it was great. She says it was, too. I didn't expect it to fix us, but I thought it might help.



This past weekend, Saturday, I asked a simple question why she has had my book for three months and hadn't read it. She said it was because it wasn't her favorite genre of romance. I saw red. I regret much of what I said, but it started with "Bullshit. You love me, right? This has been important to me for more than a decade, right? Why can't you just read it?" and our fight started. A nasty one. An exhausting one. For the first time in our entire marriage I chose not to go to bed with her that night. Everything came back. My parents, my unloving wife, everything. I contemplated suicide but figured I wouldn't be good enough to succeed and that she would be stuck taking care of a vegetable. So I didn't. I'm here still. I don't plan to do that anymore. Please don't worry, however few of you have read this far.



Any time I try to talk to her, I can tell she just has no feelings for me anymore. I do anything and everything to help her, and I wanted to be that rock for support, but I've been a rock weighing her down. I talked to her sunday, I talked to her monday, and she said that she lied at our couples therapy. She wasn't at an 8. She was at a 6, and now it's dropped to a 4.



Part of me loves that, because she is honest and a 4 isn't a 1, we can maybe still salvage this...but I don't think we will.



She has grown and changed over the 14 years we have been together. She is no longer the person she was in college. And I get that. But I love who she was then, and I love even more now who she is now. I want her to stay, I want this family to continue. And she says she wants to leave. Because she deserves to be happy and that I deserve to have someone who loves me as much as I love her. And I want her to be happy. If that's away from me, then so be it. But I do not think I'll ever love someone the way I have loved her. I don't care. I want her. I want her. I want her.



She talked to me last night about taking the kids up to her grandparents' place for the summer. That I can live here alone and the house can be well put together so that we can sell it. It was very matter of fact. It was a "maybe we can do this" but the way she was talking...its not a maybe. Its what she wants. I broke down again, and she had to leave to go to something she had planned.



I do nothing but cry these days. She fell in love with a college kid who had charisma and happiness and an easygoing nature. Now all I do is cry. I exhaust her. I want to have fun, I want to save our marriage, but every time I look at her, I grow sad. Every time I look at my children, I grow sad. My wife asked me to wrap around her last night in bed, to warm her up, and I started to cry. Because I won't have many nights of this left. My daughter cried this morning saying she didn't want to go to school because she just wanted to stay home with her family. Her whole family. And I lost it, then. Because soon we probably won't ever have our whole family together anymore and holy shit, Era. I don't know what to do. I have no idea what I can do anymore. I feel like a failure and a loser and all of it wrapped into one.



I don't know how any of you can help, but I needed to get this into words. I cried a lot writing this. I hate that I did it. I'll probably delete this later. I am so, so sad. I hate this feeling and hope more than anything that none of you have to ever experience it.

Dude never realised he was an emotional support pillow.

[HaughtyFrank]

But why am I forced to play it in that POV, in a role-playing game where you create your own character with your own preferences etc? Again, the answer is simply the male gaze.

Yes Morrigan, they decided to make the entire game an FPS because of the male gaze...

How does this even make any sense at all? Does Morrigan think "male gaze" is when you're literally inside a man?